Suzamy Jackeryl ([info]tenshibellaluna) wrote,
@ 2008-10-29 17:11:00
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Current location:Chase
Current mood: hopeful
Current music:Part of Your World Reprise-TLM OBC
Entry tags:flist, papers, school

Genderlect Paper oh my!
Hey Flist! I need some help with a paper I'm writing! If you wouldn't mind answering a few questions I could really use the help~ If you want to anon. your reply, go for it. Just specify if you are male or female please. Not that I have that many guys on my flist to begin with.



For Males:
1. Do you discuss your problems with others? If so who? Males, females or both?
2. Do you have a problem with your significant other talking to others about your relationship?

For Women:
1. Do you prefer to share your secrets with men or women? Or both?
2. What are the most important qualities in a close friend?


For Both:
1. How do you define gossip?
2. Do you find watching/reading the news is important? What do you pay attention to when you watch/read the news?
3. Is small talk important? Why or why not?


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[info]random_angelic
2008-10-29 10:13 pm UTC (link)

For Women:
1. Do you prefer to share your secrets with men or women? Or both?

Guys, but that's because I'm just more comfortable hanging out around guys in my physical life. In my virtual life I'm finding I'm having an easier time connecting to women. It's odd (or just a product of women being more active than men in fandom pursuits).

2. What are the most important qualities in a close friend?

Entertainment, my comfort level around them, and at least one similar interest to me.

Part 2:
1. How do you define gossip?

Talking about people behind their back just to bitch about them and never bothering to look into the facts. Doing it once or twice in a great while I can understand as general venting or just being angry or upset, but if you do it all the time or it's all you want to talk about is not healthy to me.

2. Do you find watching/reading the news is important? What do you pay attention to when you watch/read the news?

I do. I mostly read science/tech/health-based stuff or the personal opinions section. It's important to me bcause I like to be informed on those sort of things. Granted, I probably should be reading the current events/politics sections because we're talking world history and such happening there, but they just don't interest me and I wind up feeling like I have to play catch up because I rarely understand the why behind most of those stories.

3. Is small talk important? Why or why not?

Yes, I think it's important. It's how you feel out another person's mood and what they're like at that moment, or how you get to know someone new, or even to just pass the time. About 90% of conversations someone has in the day is small talk based on my definition of it.

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[info]dreamoflight
2008-10-29 11:20 pm UTC (link)
Women:
1. No one. Haha. Which is a bit of an exaggeration, but the only people I've ever gotten close enough to to share secrets are girls, not counting when you're a little kid and gender doesn't really matter. So: women, but I'm not sure if that's a circumstantial thing or a choice I would have made anyway. Although parental-wise I'm more comfortable talking about stuff with my mom, even though I'm more like my dad.
2. Trust. And a sort of mutual caring/comfort level thing. People express caring differently, out of my two closest friends one of them I can talk to for hours about my problems when I'm down, and the other one will let me come over and we'll watch shitty daytime TV and eat way too much junk food and not really talk much at all, but just being with them helps even though I'm doing totally different things.

Both:
1. The sort of "hey did you hear what happened to ____" thing. Sometimes you need to vent to a third party about a friend or talk about problems with someone or whatever, and I don't consider that gossip, gossip I consider to be more of a storytelling thing.

2. It's probably important. I don't really do it, I only tend to pay attention when someone links me an article, although I have a general sense of what's going on just because people tend to talk about current events.

3. Sure. I'll only bother to do it when it's with a friend, though. I don't find talking about random things with strangers fun; if after a couple of small talk conversations we don't really click or have nothing in common or it's more effort than it's worth, I'll stop trying. But not every conversation has to be about big important things, sometimes it's nice just to sit around and complain about how much it's snowing or how much the buses suck or whatever.

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[info]vivider
2008-10-30 01:29 am UTC (link)
For Women:
1. Do you prefer to share your secrets with men or women? Or both?
Women, but that's just because I seem to bond more easily with them. I'm always a little scared that men won't take my secrets with the appropriate level of gravity. Been burned one too many times on that one.

2. What are the most important qualities in a close friend?
The ability to be open with them, hands down. I don't see how I could be friends with someone if I had to censor myself for them. In addition, being able to work through problems productively with me, as well as humoring me when I get spastic, is appreciated.


For Both:
1. How do you define gossip?
Information from questionable sources spread for the purposes of self-gratification.

2. Do you find watching/reading the news is important? What do you pay attention to when you watch/read the news?
I rarely ever watch or read the news. When I do look up the news, though, I pay attention to the order and manner in which the stories are presented. I think that the broadcasting company's treatment of the story to be more interesting than the story itself: it's unlikely that the story will affect me personally in some way, but the company's affect is demonstrative of societal whims.

3. Is small talk important? Why or why not?
Small talk is utilized to make the conversational participants feel more at ease. Soothing rattled nerves is nothing to scoff at, but it certainly isn't something that will build a lasting relationship. It's akin to making a sand castle one grain at a time - it goes much quicker if you use the bucket of felicitous overtures.

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[info]cockpuppet
2008-10-30 10:06 am UTC (link)
1. Do you prefer to share your secrets with men or women? Or both?
It depends heavily on the person, but I'm probably more likely to share secrets with a girl because I have more close friends who are girls.
2. What are the most important qualities in a close friend?
Trustworthy, there for you when you need them. Makes you laugh, so you have fun when you're around them.


For Both:
1. How do you define gossip?
Talking about a person when that person is not there or a part of the conversation. Usually bitchy, or at least telling something that wouldn't normally be public, but definitely not always.
2. Do you find watching/reading the news is important? What do you pay attention to when you watch/read the news?
The only news I get is through reading the paper on my break at work. XD I think it depends on the person themselves as to how important the news is, largely - a young person is okay to not care, an older person should try to keep abreast of what's going on, for example.
As for what I pay attention too, I try to read everything but it tends to be to 'human interest' stories that get me. I'll start to glaze over reading a piece about the country's failing economy, but if I turn the page and it's MY HUSBAND WENT MISSING FOR FOUR YEARS AND TURNED UP IN HAWAII WITH HIS SECRETARY, or I AM BEING STALKED THE THE GUY AQUITTED OF MURDERING A TV PRESENTER, okay, I'll read that. I'm more interested in the people stories than the not-people stories. XD;
3. Is small talk important? Why or why not?
Depends on what you mean by small talk, but yes, I think it is. At the very least, it starts a conversation that may lead to more important topics, and it keeps a communications link up between the talkers. Psychology has taught me that lack of communication and time spent with each other will kill a relationship, be it friendship or romantic.

Edited at 2008-10-30 10:10 am UTC

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